The Rain.

It has me thinking of a million things all at once. My memory is a deep and complex trap that has so many nostalgic items tied up in the rain going through it right now. We just got back from a little walk up to get coffee where it rained a bit off and on most of the way. The minute I smelled it I was in the middle of: the orange circus peanuts in a kemp's ice cream bucket on the last day of Mrs. Desotell's Kindergarten field trip to nester park.

The day it poured for hours and my brother and I had to move the garbage bins (which were hacked off bright aqua colored containers that once held fertillizer from northside) again and again as the rain kept wooshing them off the curb.

The night my mother had a million of her hutchinson friends over, we ate green chili burritos (lorene hanson's recipe), sang and played folk tunes on the piano, and chased our first bat in the new house.

The day we went to the twin's game for a 6th grade field trip and i wore my cousin heidi's aqua green esprit spring jacket and lost the $10 my mother gave me (over which I cried the entire game).

The smell of dirt in the Tersteeg's/Terry's parking lot when they put up the greenhouse and had lilies for mother's day.

The 8th grade field trip to the eden prairie mall and then some outdoor excursion/picnic where the biggest issue was my hair getting flat because of the weather. (other noteworthy items were purple eyeliner and a whitesnake cd).

The smell of the cornfields at 6am after it had rained the night before.

In 11th grade there was a night over at julie's where denise and chad fischer took my camaro and put a LOG into it. Later that night I hooked up with the Chris Wittenberg. Also, there was a huge tornado that ripped through highway 71 going north on the night of our prom (almost paradise). I had no idea of this of course, as I had been busy at the time, hooking up with Chris Wittenberg.

The second night we had Bubby home from the hospital it rained. It was April, and the day had been hot so the rain was refreshing. He slept in the bouncy chair while we all ate Leah's wisconsin cheddar soup, watched The Sopranos, and then Deadwood. I learned how to use the breast pump that night. We had Lund's cherry cranberry "juice drink" in the refridgerator, as Lois had determined that I was dehydrated and needed to drink many more fluids.

When Bub was about a year old it would rain often too. I remember having the windows open and the nice breeze blowing in through them carrying the rainy smell. I would get paranoid that he would knock out the window-prop and cause the heavy window to slam down on his fingers, so I didn't ever let him lean out on to the window sill although he wanted to very much. We watched a lot of baby neptune back then, and the Sesame Street 25th anniversary video that had En Vogue doing one of the segments.

After Zizzy was born we took walks to walgreens and kowalski's almost every day. One time we left when the sun was shining and when we came out of the store it was pouring rain. I had to distract bubby from the unpleasantness of getting wet so the whole way back i kept telling him we were getting SOPPED! he found the word hilarious and kept repeating it too. I made a scrapbook page of a picture i took of us when we got back. Zizz in the bjorn and bub leaning in, all of us totally soaked.

Then, last year, on July 18, KRIS SCOTT left our roof exposed with no tarp over it during a downpour that lasted about 2 hours. I was here with the kids when water started pouring in, first through all the light fixtures and then through every seam in every ceiling in the back half of the house. We left the house the next day and did not live in it again until October 28.

On our way back from Starbucks tonight, Beebins was kicking and laughing and having a great time watching the other two kids run around collecting leaves. I think part of the wonder of having kids, especially when they are babies, is the complete innocence and optimism with which they see the world. I thought of all my rain memories and hoped that by the time Beatrix is my age she will have fond rain memories too. I hope my kids never have to know war or poverty or desperation. I feel like I have been lucky so far not having to deal with these things firsthand myself although many many other people have. I want days where everyone in the world has nothing on their minds but the ridiculous kinds of things that fill mine.