Monday, June 30, 2008

Banned


The kids are banned from Starbucks for probably a good couple of weeks.
Mia had a complete LOUIE over the lemonade not being shared today while I was picking up my MEAGER tips. . . Quentin completely and totally instigated this and egged her on the whole time so really I was madder at him than at her.

ugh.

Friday, June 27, 2008

A Rant About 50th and Vernon Starbucks. . .


THis has made my mood very foul.

A. nice drink.

B. not the drink I ordered

C. I thought perhaps saying, "the ***new*** blended lemonade with green tea" about 4 TIMES would clarify what I was ordering. . . . apparently not.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

A visit to the museum

We took a trip over to St. Paul to the Children's Museum today; it was fun and went well. My favorite happening by far was when, during lunch at McDonald's, Zizzy decided to pull her dress off over her head, throw it on the floor behind her, and run away from me as I tried to put it back on her. She was running around McDonald's completely unclothed save for her pull up and Dora underwear on over the top. I might have gotten a little annoyed if it wasn't so fricking RIDICULOUS.

Also: Matt has begun to let Bubby watch REN AND STIMPY lately and it's making me realize that someday, despite the fact that the shows he watches now like OSWALD and BLUE's CLUES are annoying and drive me crazy, I will probably miss them and long for the days he was so young and innocent, watching these toddler shows. I'm just not ready for REN AND STIMPY yet.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

A bit of excitement

From the norm around here, anyway:
I will sum up the best I can.

1. Somehow, someone got a hold of my visa number and tried making several charges with it through electronic websites, one for $8400 and another for $4100. Thankfully the fraud department called me immediately and the charges were never approved, but now the account is cancelled.

2. My birthday was lovely (aside from some random in Singapore trying to charge about 12k on my visa AND the mrs. meanies at pizza luce being rude). i endulged in some gluttenous fat, sugar, caffeine, and calories pretty much all afternoon and evening, justifying it because it was my birthday. i got several lovely gifts for which i am thankful.

3. beebins is about a week or two away from crawling. she is extremely happy, kicky, and roll-y all the time. hasn't been sleeping much, but at least she's happy.

4. i saw ROCK BAND today for wii at target. i held back, mostly because i know aerosmith guitar hero is coming out on the 29th and it's much more affordable. we will see about this.

5. i have both the kids quoting ROSEMARY'S BABY now, all i have to say is, "MOUSSE d'CHOCOLAT, or as minnie likes to call it. . . " and they both chime in together: CHOCOLATE MOUSE!
quentin has adapted this to also exclaim, CHOCOLATE RAT!!!!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Riiiiiiight. . .

One of the things that bothers me about living in Minneapolis is Pizza Luce.

I think I'm done with them, which pains me, because their pizza is really very good.
We're not talking homemade or authentic east coast worthy, but decent.

My problem with pizza luce is the FUCKING ATTITUDE i get every time I go in there to pick something up (because there would be no way in HELL i would even try to "dine in". . . ), apparently because the one tatoo I have is not visable, angry enough, or GOTH enough, i have no real piercings, and my sense of fashion is probably too "apple valley" for the crowd that both works at and frequents this establishment. say nothing of pulling up into the parking lot in a huge SCHOOL BUS of an expidition. . . I am not worthy of even the slightest bit of human kindness.

and also, the look every time when i neglect to write anything into the "tip" area for the check card signature slip gets me every time. WHAT? you stand there and glare at me until I, THE CUSTOMER, have to inform you that i have ordered a pizza and would like to pay for it, you snatch my card away from me, fling the pizza box at me until the melted cheese is sloshed over the side of the entire crust (at least 3 times this has happened, the lopsided cheese falling off), then thrust the slip back at me and then you are SURPRISED that i'm not writing in a tip?

YOU'RE NOT GETTING A TIP BECAUSE YOU ARE RUDE AND BITCHY.

and you know what the pisser of it is? some day one of you will probably trip over your 4 inch platform boots, gag on one of your tongue piercings and then have to rely on someone who actually knows CPR or the heimlich maneuver to get you going again (who you will then most likely infect with hepititis C, herpes, or god knows what else is lingering in your mouth), and you will still treat the world and every citizen in it who doesn't have a pierced asshole like they are somehow beneath you.

gross.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Weekend Happenings

1. Bubby has taken to getting the banjo out every time "guitar hero" is played and enjoys jamming with whoever is playing. Today he cracked us all up by getting a yellow stocking cap (of MIa's) and putting it on while I played ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICANE. "I'm bein' Slash," he told us.

2. The deck is lovely. We had noodles and company on it tonight (along with a few. . . glasses of yellow tail pinot noir). Ryan Fuller has his faults but the deck he made for us is really a wonderful thing.

3. Matt told me tonight that he thinks that Bub needs a brother. I asked him if he would be opposed to "rolling the dice" one more time, even knowing full well that it is possible if not likely we would conceive another girl. He said to let him mull it over for a while. To this I say, SO YOU'RE TELLING ME THERE'S A CHANCE.

hmmmm.....

4. I am reading a really random, exceptional group of books right now. LITTLE WOMEN, which i've been reading for a good couple of months now, has really taken a major turn for me lately and I find myself both crying and rejoicing at the sisterly events as they occur. I really have to say I love the stupid book and since I've been reading it, the kids have taken to saying, "MARMEE," which I think is hilarious. With any luck I can get them to start calling ME that full time. The other one I'm almost finished with is DESPERATION, which I have in my locker at work. I read it on my breaks and I'm about 3/4 of the way through. It's damned creepy, not that I expected anything less, but the more I read of Stephen King, his son, Joe Hill, or any author who has more than a few "works" out there, the more I realize that writers, much like actors, are very VERY self-absorbed and self-aware. There are items that King writes about, about being a writer, about being a father and husband that are so totally HIM that I just have to laugh. (not that I'm saying I'm any different or better, I'm not.)

Reading someone's book is very much like reading their own private diaries.

More on this later on.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Now I'm verclempt. . .

After a few quite unpleasant days I am happy to report that things are back on the up and up around here. Hopefully this will not jinx anything, but here goes anyway.
I have gotten over my issues with Jessica Alba. I'm sure she's a very nice person.

Beebins started sleeping quite well again. (KNOCK WOOD!) In the pack and play, by herself, without being tightly swaddled or constantly nuk-ed. Either she's getting nice and worn out during our outdoor activities during the afternoons and evenings or the growing/teething/developmental achievements are making her tired. Either way, it's been pleasant. Last night she made it until 5am. This is great!

Sometimes I look around here and watch the kids interact with each other and us and I think that I'm going to burst, they make me so happy. I am so thankful for the house and everyone in it. And the little things too, like Matt being happy at his job now, which can support us well, even my job, which has been much more fun, close, and profitable since I came to my new store.

Full moon again?
I only hope I am deserving of this.
Like Ace of Base once said, "IT'S A BEAUTIFUL LIFE."

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Complaints: Third Floor

yes. well, I wish I had a more positive blog for the weekend but I'm feeling very foul (wretched, as cher in clueless would say).

a. working during the mornings on the weekends has its good points but i am starting to get "the bitchiness." contempt for the coffee (latte, cappucino, frappucino) drinking public is starting to seep into me. when i am at the bar during a morning rush and i hear a ridiculous drink (in my book, ANYTHING with a customizer or modifier) (which will account for approximately 80% of all drinks made) I automatically get irritated and really just want to wad up the paper cup with the annoying drink written on it, crush it into a ball and WHIP IT TO THE CURB.

I GOT YOUR 2 SHOTS REGULAR 1 SHOT DECAF 2and 1/2 PUMP OF VANILLA HALF SOY HALF NONFAT LIGHT FOAM ONE-HUNDRED AND FORTY DEGREE LATTE **RIGHT HERE**.


b. father's day: i go out of my way to get some requested trout at kowalski's, decided that by itself is not enough, throw in a $30 starbucks gift card, and try to stomach the mushy piece of fish i got and then want to throw everything to the curb (literally) after a ridiculous jessica alba comment.

now that i think about it, i'm sure beatrix kiddo (were she real) would never worry about being upstaged by younger, thinner, prettier girls. you know why? because BEING BEATRIX KIDDO IS ENOUGH. end of that.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Now I know how Britney feels. . .

Sometimes it's just nice to be left alone.

We had a great day. We went to the zoo and all the kids were great. I got the kids all down for their naps and the phone starts ringing. I really didn't want to answer it. Since I don't know how to turn the ringer off on the stupid thing I was forced to either answer the calls or hang up on the callers or just leave the fucker off the hook. First it's my mother, calling to see if I've heard from Charlie yet. NO. I haven't. He doesn't return my calls either. Then, some goddamned work person calling about something I ALREADY TOLD HER I COULD NOT DO. Then I check the caller ID earlier just for giggles and see that RYAN FULLER was on there this morning.


ugh. Tell him I'm out of the country.
"I KNOW SHE'S IN THE COUNTRY, MRS. MANCINI, SINCE I'M PRETTY SURE I SAW HER THIS MORNING!"

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

KING OF PAIN.




as in, i feel like the.

yesterday did not go well.
beebins woke up at 545. FOR THE MORNING. she had been up approximately 3 times prior to this early waking, so needless to say matt and i were both very tired and did not share her kicking enthusiasm for the morning. then she had a doctor's appointment at 10, which matt brough her to, and she had to get 3 shots, which is never pleasant. matt said she was super happy and kicky, flailing about and smiling at everyone. then the sticks. . . and the WHY DID YOU DO THAT? WHY DID YOU LET THEM DO THAT TO ME?!?!?!? look . . .

while matt and beebins were at the doc's, i took the kids up to walgreens to get some cleaning supplies and then a coffee cake snack at starbucks. mia proceeds to fall onto the knee which was scabbed up 2 days ago from falling on it, and reopens the wound and bleeds everywhere. so we go BACK to walgreens to get some sponge bob bandaids and head home.
later, after a target trip I manage to burn my arm on the oven taking the pizza out and the kids were running around spazzing from the sugar in the lemondae (bi-ade) i let them have with dinner.

NEXT: as they are chasing all over the place, mia pushes quentin into the wall, where he splits a gash into his head. it was gushing blood and causes us all to pile into the truck and speed to the southdale ER. I called work on the way there, and luckily they were covered so they told me to not worry about it. long story short=we wait until 1030pm for bubby to get the wound stapled together. matt brought the girls home after leah (FAMILY SAVIOR) showed up with a jimmy john's and later some coffee for me, entertainment, and moral support for bub. she also took pictures of his head so he could "see" what it looked like, as he kept asking.

AND matt got a migrane.

THE END.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

The Rain.

It has me thinking of a million things all at once. My memory is a deep and complex trap that has so many nostalgic items tied up in the rain going through it right now. We just got back from a little walk up to get coffee where it rained a bit off and on most of the way. The minute I smelled it I was in the middle of: the orange circus peanuts in a kemp's ice cream bucket on the last day of Mrs. Desotell's Kindergarten field trip to nester park.

The day it poured for hours and my brother and I had to move the garbage bins (which were hacked off bright aqua colored containers that once held fertillizer from northside) again and again as the rain kept wooshing them off the curb.

The night my mother had a million of her hutchinson friends over, we ate green chili burritos (lorene hanson's recipe), sang and played folk tunes on the piano, and chased our first bat in the new house.

The day we went to the twin's game for a 6th grade field trip and i wore my cousin heidi's aqua green esprit spring jacket and lost the $10 my mother gave me (over which I cried the entire game).

The smell of dirt in the Tersteeg's/Terry's parking lot when they put up the greenhouse and had lilies for mother's day.

The 8th grade field trip to the eden prairie mall and then some outdoor excursion/picnic where the biggest issue was my hair getting flat because of the weather. (other noteworthy items were purple eyeliner and a whitesnake cd).

The smell of the cornfields at 6am after it had rained the night before.

In 11th grade there was a night over at julie's where denise and chad fischer took my camaro and put a LOG into it. Later that night I hooked up with the Chris Wittenberg. Also, there was a huge tornado that ripped through highway 71 going north on the night of our prom (almost paradise). I had no idea of this of course, as I had been busy at the time, hooking up with Chris Wittenberg.

The second night we had Bubby home from the hospital it rained. It was April, and the day had been hot so the rain was refreshing. He slept in the bouncy chair while we all ate Leah's wisconsin cheddar soup, watched The Sopranos, and then Deadwood. I learned how to use the breast pump that night. We had Lund's cherry cranberry "juice drink" in the refridgerator, as Lois had determined that I was dehydrated and needed to drink many more fluids.

When Bub was about a year old it would rain often too. I remember having the windows open and the nice breeze blowing in through them carrying the rainy smell. I would get paranoid that he would knock out the window-prop and cause the heavy window to slam down on his fingers, so I didn't ever let him lean out on to the window sill although he wanted to very much. We watched a lot of baby neptune back then, and the Sesame Street 25th anniversary video that had En Vogue doing one of the segments.

After Zizzy was born we took walks to walgreens and kowalski's almost every day. One time we left when the sun was shining and when we came out of the store it was pouring rain. I had to distract bubby from the unpleasantness of getting wet so the whole way back i kept telling him we were getting SOPPED! he found the word hilarious and kept repeating it too. I made a scrapbook page of a picture i took of us when we got back. Zizz in the bjorn and bub leaning in, all of us totally soaked.

Then, last year, on July 18, KRIS SCOTT left our roof exposed with no tarp over it during a downpour that lasted about 2 hours. I was here with the kids when water started pouring in, first through all the light fixtures and then through every seam in every ceiling in the back half of the house. We left the house the next day and did not live in it again until October 28.

On our way back from Starbucks tonight, Beebins was kicking and laughing and having a great time watching the other two kids run around collecting leaves. I think part of the wonder of having kids, especially when they are babies, is the complete innocence and optimism with which they see the world. I thought of all my rain memories and hoped that by the time Beatrix is my age she will have fond rain memories too. I hope my kids never have to know war or poverty or desperation. I feel like I have been lucky so far not having to deal with these things firsthand myself although many many other people have. I want days where everyone in the world has nothing on their minds but the ridiculous kinds of things that fill mine.

Sunday events


1. I worked for 3.5 hours this morning. I planned on finishing at 1030 and then leaving to go to church at annunciation, which is across the street from Starbucks. ONCE AGAIN I chickened out and ditched. I just think I really need someone to go with me the first time. I have no clue what to do, nor do I know anyone who goes there save for my former boss from Northwest Airlines, MICHAEL, who ironically was the one whose name was on the termination notice fed-exed to my house 2 weeks after I quit going there. And I'm guessing that if I was going to run into anyone there, it would be him, being as I see him every time there is an Annunciation Community Event AND going into Kowalski's with his kids yesterday. One day I am going to have to face him and probably say things; I am wondering if it will be as uncomfortable for him? At least he was nice to me while I was there.

now for a bit of venting. i'm not **that** uptight about what is about to follow, but sometimes it gets old. i do very much love my job and i'm very happy to have it. HOWEVER:

2. I have a great new idea for Starbucks. Well, MY Starbucks, anyway. It's called, "THE MODIFIER ON THE CUP IS BROKEN" game. Here's how it works: Starbucks has 4 hot sizes. Short (8oz), Tall (12oz), Grande (16oz), and Venti (20oz). 3 iced sizes. tall (12 oz), grande (16oz), and venti (24 oz). There are several drink options to choose from. Brewed Coffee, Mistos (au laits), Lattes, Cappucinos, Americanos, Mochas, White Mochas, Caramel Macchiatos, Espresso Macchiatos, Frappucinos, Syrup Flavors, shots of espressos, and teas. You can have 2% milk, skim milk, whole milk, soy milk, or half and half in your drinks. Before ordering at my starbucks, customers have to sign off that they have read my Starbucks manifesto:

1. brewed coffee is filled to 1/4 inch from top. if you request room for cream it goes up to 1/2 inch from top. i am not giving you any more or less room than that. if you ask me for a bigger cup (such as ordering a tall size coffee in a venti cup so as to DROWN it in cream, you are not really a coffee drinker you are a dairy masquerade-er. GROSS.) YOU GET NOTHING. if you ask me for ice cubes YOU GET NOTHING.


2. Lattes are made by putting in the espresso shots, then steamed milk, then 1/4 inch of FOAM. do not say "FROTH" in my presence. If you say the word "FROTH" i will throw a milk pitcher at your face. You may not specifiy "no foam" because the latte COMES with foam. It is how a latte is made. If you don't like foam, YOU DON"T LIKE LATTES. Do not specify the degree of milk temperature. All milk temperatures are steamed to 160 degrees. Nothing more, nothing less, unless you are getting a mocha or white mocha where the milk is steamed to 170. If you like extra or not-so-hot, YOU DON"T LIKE LATTES. Do not specify any different number of syrup pumps when you are ordering a flavored latte. 2 for short, 3 for tall, 4 for grande, and 5 for venti. (6 for iced venti). If you want more or less then YOU DON"T LIKE FLAVORED LATTES. Also. If you specify 1/2 pumps of syrup (even though you are not allowed to specify ANYHING OTHER THAN THE NORM) you're getting the milk pitcher thrown at you, again. If you even think of asking milk options to be mixed, you will get the milk mixed, IN THE PITCHER, WHEN I THROW IT AT YOUR FACE. Mochas come with whipped cream. White mochas come with whipped cream. Frappucinos come with whipped cream. If you tell me "no whipped cream," guess what? YOU GET NOTHING (and the whipped cream cannister guess where?)

3. Do not ever EVER try to pay with anything larger than a twenty dollar bill. If I see anyone come in (before noon) with a $50 or a $100 bill I will rip it to shreds, put it in a milk pitcher and throw it in your face.


HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!!!

Friday, June 6, 2008

Dreams

Last night I dreamed that John Neal (RYAN FULLER) had his trailer parked out in front of the house on the street. I was sleeping on the couch and woke up to him ringing the doorbell. I decided NOT to answer it and then he walked around the house and rang the other doorbell. I didn't answer that one either. Then I knew that he was going to come around to the deck door (which of course was unlocked) and let himself in the house. Next thing I know I am in my bed upstairs but instead of him it's CHRIS WITTENBERG (CASEY FULLER). No more details are really necessary other than that it was very disturbing and probably realistically things that he's both said and done, numerous times.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Events Lately

1. We have an albino squirrel running around outside, a baby one. The cats almost had it cornered many times. It doesn't seem very skilled in evading predators, which makes me feel a little sorry for it, but I also really don't want it "camping" here either.

2. John Neal (Ryan Fuller) is completely COMPLETELY out to lunch. When he called Matt at work the other day (after making extremely weird comments to Jessica on the phone) he asked if there were any other things about the deck he wanted done. Matt listed 4 things. He came over yesterday and did 1 out of the 4 things and left. He also seems to think that Matt is his "web bitch," having to do updates and changes ON DEMAND, and on demand usually occurs at least 4 or 5 times per week.
I think the only solution to this is for Matt to explain to him what exactly he would normally charge for changes on a website, along the lines of $150 per hour. 8 hours of work would probably make a jarring impression on him so he could realize just how much "charity" Matt has given him until now.

seriously.

I look around "society" a lot of the time and am struck by how many randoms SUCk at their one job.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

The Day's Events

Nothing major. The only noteworthy item I find myself with is the haggard woman who brought her four HORRIBLY BEHAVED boys with her to Starbucks this afternoon, and how she basically made me feel as though I have three model children after observing her and hers. AND rewarded them all with vanilla bean frappucinos.

Also: I have an arthritic hip. It started bothering me during the last few months of pregnancy with Beebins and for a few months after she was born. Now, after nothing for months, it's back. I wonder if it's the weather?